


Peace

by DanieXJ



Category: Guiding Light
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-07-10
Updated: 2009-07-10
Packaged: 2017-11-20 10:04:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/584167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DanieXJ/pseuds/DanieXJ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Olivia finally finds a sort of peace. Takes place after the 7/6/09 episode.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Can I get no peace?" Doris threw her hands up. "One moment of my day alone and..." Olivia raised her head. Her face was streaked with mascara and she looked like she'd gone fifteen rounds with someone really angry at her face. "Whoa... raccoon chic."

Olivia shook her head and closed her eyes. The hotelier still hadn't said anything. She hadn't parried back. That's what the two of them did. Doris threw words at Olivia, and Olivia threw them back with equal gusto. "What the hell's wrong with you?"

Olivia took a couple of breaths and opened her eyes. "She left... just... a, a convent or, retreat or, it doesn't matter. She told Father Ray, and Blake, and she couldn't... Whatever, I could, we could have..." 

She trailed off as Doris sat down across the aisle from Olivia. She wasn't going to get a quiet lunch. "Let me guess. Ray was an ass when you inquired where Natalia was, and Blake was all... 'don't worry it'll all turn out okay, it all turned out alright for me and my dead husband'?"

Olivia gave quite an unladylike sniffle, "Something like that. She's... I've given her my heart, I've given her my daughter, I've given her time, space... I just... what else does she want? I just need to know."

"You like sex."

Olivia's head snapped up and she stared at Doris. The mayor hid a smirk. That had brought the fighting spirit back into Olivia's eyes. "It's not the sex."

"It's always the sex. How many times have you two had sex, or even kissed hmm?"

Olivia shook her head and stood. She swiped at her eyes and cheeks, but it didn't help her look. "Relationships are more than just about sex Doris. What Nat and I..."

Doris stood and was suddenly in Olivia's face. "I'm not talking about your relationship." She got to within a hair's breadth of Olivia's lips. "I'm talking about two souls coming together and.... and..." Doris shook her head and took one, then another step back. "I..." She held her hands up in front of her. "I'm not getting involved. I told myself I wouldn't, and I'm not going to." She started to gather her things, her entire focus seemed to be on putting away her pen in the proper pocket. "You two will work it out." She picked up her bag and held it in front of her chest. "It's written in the stars, or at least some piece of paper somewhere. You'll work it out."

Doris turned and was nearly out the courtroom's door when Olivia spoke in barely a whisper. "What if it's not?"

Doris turned, "You and Natalia?"

Olivia came towards Doris, every second she seemed to becoming more like the Olivia Spencer Doris had met all those years ago and less of the empty shell of a woman Doris thought Liv had turned into. "Why do you care?" There was an edge to her voice, and Doris wasn't sure what it meant.

"Sport. C'mon. I'm the Mayor of Springfield. Are you aware of how intensely boring that is?"

Olivia didn't move, she just stood there, staring at Doris Wolfe for what seemed like forever, still as a rock. Doris was about to inquire whether Olivia was having a stroke or some sort of seizure episode when the woman moved with purpose.

After one step she had backed Doris into a corner, and after the next her lips met Doris'. The courtroom, her courtroom, where she was always in control. Doris was spiraling out of control as Olivia pressed her whole body up against the Mayor's. She needed control, she wanted control, she was very, very good at control. That's why they sparred, that's why what was happening was a horrible idea. Totally, utterly.

Doris knew the second it happened. Olivia came up for air, and she felt the hotel owner's fingers on her jacket. And those damn eyes met hers. "How long..." was all she could get out before Doris made her decision.

Olivia guided Doris backwards until the Mayor's thighs hit the prosecutor's table. Doris made a mental note that she'd need to get the tables switched. Olivia lifted Doris up onto the table and started to undo the buttons, one, by one. But Doris stilled the other woman's hands. She had important information. "Twenty minutes..."

Olivia reached up and brushed a lock of Doris' hair from her eyes. "Good... now, shut up."


	2. Chapter 2

"One of these days Jane is going to kill her."

Olivia paused buttoning her shirt. "Either that or I'll kill Jane for lettin' the Jellybean out of her sight, yet again." She glanced around her room. Her eyes finally landed on Doris and she smiled, "Uh, Doris..."

Doris looked up, "It's okay, I know I'm just... the distraction." She pushed a lock of Olivia's hair out of her green blue eyes and kissed her. "It's okay..."

With that the Mayor left the room. Olivia put a hand to her lips for a moment, then shook her head and mumbled, "Your jacket's buttoned wrong."

The door opened and Emma burst in, followed by Jane, who did a double take. "Oh, Ms. Spencer, you're home."

"Not for long."

Emma pulled Olivia down to her level. "Are you goin' to find Natalia?"

Olivia thought for a moment before she nodded, "I am. To make sure she's okay."

Emma frowned, "And bring her back?"

Olivia sat down in front of Emma and took her daughter's hands in her own. "I don't know what's going to happen. But I do know that Natalia will always be a part of your... our lives. Okay?"

Emma stared at her mother for a long couple of minutes, "You promise?"

"I promise. Now, are you going help me up or leave your poor old mother on the cold ground?"

Emma laughed and yanked with all her strength at Olivia until she was standing. Olivia ruffled her daughters hair and gave her a kiss on the forehead. "Love you jellybean."

"I love you too Mommy. I hope you find Natalia."

Olivia nodded as she glanced over at the recently made bed. "Yeah."

oOOOOo

"I am such an idiot."

Buzz put a burger, fries and a Pepsi in front of Doris. "I'm hoping you didn't lose all of Springfield's money."

Doris looked up, "What, no, of course not Buzz."

Buzz sat down across from Doris, who hadn't touch the mean she hadn't ordered. "So, is it anything mayoral?"

Doris shook her head, "It doesn't matter Buzz, leave it."

Buzz shrugged and wiped an invisible piece of something off the table, "I'm just the town's...."

"Buzz. Just. Stop Speaking."

Buzz folded his hands on the table. "Who is he... and why are you an idiot because of him?"

Doris stared at Buzz for a long moment, finally she spoke, "The name doesn't matter." She paused, "There's someone else, was there first. They're... together. And yet again, I always pick the unavailable ones..."

"Why?"

"Don't psychoanalyze me Buzz." She stood, but Buzz put a hand on her arm to stop her from leaving.

"I won't, no psychoanalyzing the psycho." Doris narrowed her eyes at Company's owner. "Sit, eat. Please."

Doris paused a moment but finally sat and stared at the plate, but didn't speak. It was finally Buzz who had to break the silence. "Do you love him?"

"Yes, for... a while now, even before we... Yes."

"Have you told him?"

Doris shook her head, "No. Hell no."

Buzz frowned, "Why not?" Doris tried to burn holes in Buzz's forehead. "I don't mean that in a psychological way at all." He crossed his heart with his finger. "I promise."

Doris sighed and took a sip of the Pepsi. She raised her eyebrows as she put it down, "Real Pop?"

"I can get you diet, but a little sugar has never been bad for a broken heart. So, why haven't you told your love how you feel?"

Doris glanced over Buzz's shoulder. "Because it doesn't matter. Their love, it's super... it's... epic."

"Nah."

Doris met Buzz's gaze again. "Nah?"

"Love is Love. Sure, sometimes it's angst and tears and bold proclamations of the soul. Like Josh and Reva, or Phillip and Beth, the world revolves around them. But, you know that on any of death beds there's only one person they want there. Only one face other than their children's' that they want to see as they pass to the next life." He paused with a smile for a minute before he continued, "But sometimes you just find someone that is in you. There's no need for words, there's no need for grand gestures. Maybe you've known them forever, but maybe you never really knew her at all."

Doris mumbled, "Never knew them at all..." She looked up, "The her, your her, is Lillian."

There was no question in Doris' question. Buzz nodded. "But..."

Buzz wasn't done, "And we don't just love one person in our lives. There is no... one... true love. Take Olivia."

Doris blinked and tried in vain to hide the surprise on her face, but she didn't have to, Buzz was in his own world. "Olivia loved Frank, me, Phillip, Josh and Bill." He paused, "I think she may have actually loved Alan too." Buzz shook his head, "I won't pretend to understand that one." He focused on Doris again, "Just because this guy of yours loves his wife, girlfriend, doesn't mean he's not in love with you too."

Doris smirked, "Buzz Cooper, advocating adultery..."

"That's not..."

Doris chuckled, "I'm going to eat now. So, you're going to go?"

Buzz shook his head and stood. "Have a good meal." He walked away still shaking his head.

"Thank you."

Buzz turned, not believing the whispered words he'd heard from Doris, but she had already taken a bite of the burger. Buzz shook his head.


	3. Chapter 3

"Ma'am. The whole point of this place is for people to be alone with their thoughts. No interruptions during their contemplation."

They'd been going back and forth for at least fifteen minutes and nothing seemed to work. Olivia decided to come at the nun from a different side. "Please. Just let me see her? Make sure she's okay?"

The nun seemed to be inspecting Olivia's molecular structure. "And then, once you're inside, you'll talk to her anyway."

Olivia didn't pause, "Yes."

"It's that important?"

"Yes."

The nun closed her eyes for a moment and Olivia was convinced she was going to get another no. She was stumped about what else she could say that would persuade the nun, and she was stunned when the other woman opened her eyes and nodded. "I will let you see her, talk to her, if she agrees to it."

Olivia inclined her head, "Thank you sister."

The sister raised one eyebrow, then shook her head, "Don't thank me yet Ms. Spencer. Your friend hasn't said yes."

oOOOOo

Natalia had said yes and was sitting under a tree on the other side of the garden area. But Olivia found she couldn't move towards the tree or the woman. She had fallen into the same pattern she always did. Fall for one, then break that one's heart with another. She had spiced things up a bit since they were both women, but she had lived up to every bad word Frank had thrown at her in the hospital. She was stuck.

Finally she shook her head. She was Olivia Spencer. Even when she was screwing up lives left and right, she took her lumps and kept on fighting. She started over towards the tree, and squared her shoulders as she got there. The younger woman stood, they hugged, and both sat again.

They were silent, holding each other's hands tightly. They both started speaking at the same time.

"Natalia."

"Olivia."

Olivia gave a gentle smile, "You first."

Natalia took her hand from Olivia so she could worry at the hem of her shirt with both hands. "I'm pregnant."

The smile disappeared. "From your time with Frank." Olivia wasn't asking a question. "Are you okay? It's been almost..." Olivia frowned and lifted Natalia's chin with two fingers so the younger woman had to look at her. "Are you and... and... she, he, okay?"

"Them." Olivia blinked in surprise as she took a hold of Natalia's hand again. "I know, super fertile Natalia Rivera. I could be a Marvel mutant. Yes, we're all fine, and I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry."

Olivia shook her head, "You have nothing to be sorry about Natalia. When you and..." She stopped and restarted, "At that point in time, neither of us was in a good place, and we were nowhere near being anything but friends."

Natalia shook her head, "Not about me and Frank. I'm sorry that I ran away. I'm sorry that I lied about..."

Olivia cut Natalia off, "You didn't lie..."

"Please Olivia I..."

Olivia shook her head. It was her turn to avert her eyes. She watched as across the garden three older women set up to do some yoga. "Please don't apologize to me Natalia. Mine... mine is so much worse."

It was Natalia's turn to frown, "Liv?"

Olivia pulled her gaze away from the yoga nuns and back to Natalia. She could do it. She was Olivia 'freaking' Spencer, conqueror of men, big businesswoman in Springfield. "I cheated."

"With Josh. I know that you two kissed. Then you pushed him away and left on your own..."

Olivia tilted her head to one side, "Do you have a direct input to the traffic cams?" Olivia gently turned Natalia's head from side to side, "Where's the jack? How do you plug in?"

Natalia batted Olivia's hands away and both women gave the other a bit more room on the bench. "Will you tell me?"

Olivia swiped at her eyes and took a deep breath, "I... I wish..."

Natalia spoke quietly, "It won't work. We won't work. That's what I've realized here."

Their eyes met and silence fell again. They both stared off at anything but the other person.

Olivia was about to speak when a choked sob came from Natalia. Olivia scootched over and hugged Natalia to her. They younger woman curled into Olivia and the sobs came and came. Olivia didn't know how long they sat just like that. Natalia's tears soaking through Olivia's shirt while the hotel owner rubbed circles on Natalia's back.

Finally Natalia slowly sat up and wiped at her eyes, "I... I don't want to do this alone again. I... I can't."

"You won't."

"What?"

Olivia stood, but only went as far as the tree. Natalia turned on the bench and waited. It was always best to let Olivia have her space, pushing only brought Olivia's fight or flight response. And usually Olivia chose fight. It wasn't too long until Olivia turned and spoke, "We've been through a lot. We're best friends. I mean, we were at least. I've never... never really had a real best friend, and I love you, but..."

"Since my aborted wedding it's been all weird and..."

"...uncomfortable."

Olivia nodded and ran her hand along the tree's bark. "I do love you and I would do anything for you." She continued in a rush. "It wasn't the sex, I swear on Gus' heart it wasn't."

Natalia stood and joined Olivia at the tree. "I know. I thought that I could. I'm not ready for any sex, not just not ready for... you know. I don't know if I will ever be ready. And, I realized, ever since I arrived in Springfield I've been going from one person who takes care of me and Rafe to another. Gus, Frank, you."

"Will you..."

Natalia cut Olivia off, "I don't love Frank, I never did. No matter what happens with us, it won't change that fact. Guilt isn't a good basis for a relationship or a marriage, neither are children."

Olivia put a hand on Natalia's lower abdomen, "But you two will be forever connected."

Natalia covered Olivia's hand with her own, "I know. but I'm not a teenager, I'm..."

Olivia smirked, "Older."

Natalia narrowed her eyes, "Yes." She paused, "Are you sure that it wasn't..."

Olivia held three fingers up, "I swear, girl scout honor, it's not the sex. I..."

Natalia nodded, "Doris."

Olivia's head snapped up, "How did you?"

A small smile came to Natalia's lips despite the gravity of the conversation, "I'm plugged in, remember?"

"Natalia..."

"Sorry. Plus you two flirt like bees and pollen."

"I flirt with everyone."

"I know. But with her. She likes you too you know."

Olivia didn't look convinced, "I doubt it."

"Then why did you get involved with her. You were willing to break up what we may have had for her. You're telling me that you just did it for fun?"

Olivia sighed, "Why did I cheat with her... because a wise woman I know taught me that sometimes you have to put yourself out there even if you don't know the end result. Sometimes you have to have faith. Of course, I'm pretty sure that this woman didn't quite have this situation in mind."

"Wise huh?"

Olivia shrugged and squawked a 'hey' as Natalia gave her shoulder a push, "What? What did I say?"

Natalia shook her head, "Can we go home?"

Olivia put out her hand and Natalia gripped it. They pulled each other into a hug. Over Natalia's shoulder Olivia met the eyes of the sister who had let her in. Olivia mouthed 'Thank you' and the sister gave a nod in response.

The two women parted, "Let's go home. I'm under direct orders to find and bring you back to Springfield post haste."

Natalia chuckled, "Emma..." Her look sobered, "Emma..."

"Natalia, do you truly believe that Em would ever let me yank her from your life or you from hers?"

"No."

"She'd just run away." Natalia winced, "Then I'd have to ground her and she'd be all moody and pre-teeny and eventually just try to run away again."

Natalia quirked her eyebrows, "So you're cutting out the middleman?"

Olivia smiled, "So... now that our relationship is nice and simple. Best Fr..."

An unladylike snort escaped Natalia's nose. She covered it, "Simple? Olivia, nothing with you is ever simple."

"Do I get to finish my sentence?"

"I don't think an elite commando team could get past Sister Mary and Sister Edith. Do you plan to tell me how you got in here?"

Olivia shrugged, "Probably not."

"Then I'm not sure that you'll get to finish your sentence."

"Now that..."

Natalia interrupted as promised, "We're like, Izzy and George. Well, before their current situations..."

Olivia squinted at Natalia. "Who, what? George who?"

"They made better friends than lovers. Well, until Izzy went crazy with skin cancer and the writers seemed to forget that George even existed."

They stopped in front of Olivia's car. "What are you talking about?"

Natalia studied Olivia, "Right, you don't like the primetime soap-y stuff. Hmm... okay. Bev and Jean-Luc. You like Star Trek right?"

"Shush, shush woman, shush..." Olivia glanced around the parking lot as if Ninjas were going to jump from the shadows at any moment. "Yes. Fine, yes, what is your point Natalia Rivera?"

"They never get together, Bev is married, then under Jean-Luc's command with all that angst. At one point they almost get there, but like us, it's just not meant to be. You're ready. I'm not, and I'm not sure if I'll ever be. And, as much as you say differently, if you settle for no sex, just kisses, hugs, and our friendship, you'll wind up hating me."

Olivia spoke quietly, "They got together in the Post Nemesis books."

Natalia threaded an arm through Olivia's. "So, we go our own way for seven seasons. You meet a piano player, then get to decide whether to send her to her death, and then you get lucky on every planet in every movie. I'll just meet a Dax who has no spots and seems to need more hosts than socks. Maybe it'll work out with us. But, right now, you need to see if you and Doris work, because when you talk about her now, and maybe even a little before, you light up. And I... I need to become my own person. Be on my own for a while, find where the heck I left my own wings."

She paused, "Maybe one of these days it will be our time, or maybe we'll be..."

"BFFs?"

Natalia gave Olivia a push on the shoulder, but Olivia hadn't been ready for it and Natalia watched in horror as Olivia flailed backwards and landed butt first in a giant mud puddle.

She sat there in the puddle and shook her head, "Think this is a bad sign?"

"You know what?" She braced herself against the car so Olivia wouldn't be able to pull her into the mud puddle and yanked Olivia to her feet. Olivia dabbed a bit of mud on Natalia's nose. Natalia looked cross eyed at the dab of earth. "I don't think I believe in signs anymore." She wiped off the mud. "And no religion is going to tell me who I should make my family ever again."

"Natalia."

She held a hand up, "I'm not giving up my faith or turning my back on it. But Father Ray is not going to be my priest any longer. I'll find a new place to worship, one where I feel comfortable again."

Olivia wiped her hand on the side of her white car and unlocked the passenger door. "Your chariot awaits."

"Home, and real life." Olivia nodded and Natalia frowned, "What were you going to ask me?"

Olivia slid into the driver's seat with a squish. She winced at the thought of what was happening to her seats, then spoke, "Ah, right. Just wondered if you wanted your job back."

"Olivia Spencer, you can no longer afford me."

Olivia laughed as she pulled out of the parking lot.


	4. Chapter 4

"Doris, are you unwell?"

Doris looked up from her lunch. She needed to find a new place to have lunch. Way too many people had been clued into the courtroom. "I'm fine."

Lillian leaned against the other table and watched Doris eat. "Did you hear about Natalia and Olivia. The rumors are flying that they're a couple."

"Really?"

"Doris."

Doris stood, threw out her lunch leavings, and slung her back over her shoulder. "Lillian. I'm fine, you can tell Buzz that verbatim."

Lillian stood there stunned as Doris powered out of the courtroom.

oOOOOo

Emma was over at the farmhouse. Olivia was quite sure that they were baking something, or watching an endless marathon of brain altering Disney DVDs. On the way home from the retreat the previous day Natalia had asked Olivia what they should tell Emma about their situation, about what had happened.

Olivia had begged for a little time to figure it out. But in the mid-morning light Olivia still had no idea how to deal with any of it.

Finally she grabbed her keys off the dresser and was nearly at the suite's door when it flew open. Olivia took two quick steps back. It was Doris and she didn't even give Olivia a second to gasp in surprise let alone speak.

"I get it. I don't deserve anything good. And I'm the only one to blame for my crappy life. I lied to everyone for years. I treat people like chattel, I don't deserve to have a great daughter like Ashlee, or to have your love. and I know it's only my fault. I know that." She sucked in a breath, "But I want a chance too. People who are evil and horrible and, and, they get a chance, I want a chance too. And, I know that I don't have a chance, but.."

Olivia crossed her arms over her chest and finally cut Doris off, "Are you always going to be like this now? Gooey and..."

"Gooey?" She nearly bumped into Olivia, "I'm laying my heart out there, what little heart I have left according to Springfield. GOOEY?"

Olivia bit her lip, bit the inside of her cheek, and her tongue. It wasn't a good time to laugh, it was a horrible time to laugh. And yet she just couldn't help herself. Laughter burst from her in waves. She was laughing so hard that she had to sit down on her bed so she wouldn't fall down.

Doris was nearly red and had her hand on the door knob when Olivia finally got control of the laughter and found her voice, "Wait." She cleared her throat and wiped at her eyes. "I'm sorry. That didn't. Do you know how long it's been since I've laughed like that?"

Doris turned. She was still obviously furious. "I am not laughed at, ever."

A short staccato laugh came from Olivia, "Mmm... well, you'd better get used to it. Because..."

Doris was on a roll, or, at least, she thought she was. She stalked towards Olivia and poked her in the chest. "Is that what this was, all a set up. Poor Doris, she's gullible enough, I'll set her up and knock 'er outta the park right. Someone to keep you warm until Ms. Perfect Pants comes to her senses right?" She threw up her hands, "I'm done. I can't..."

Olivia had spoken, but Doris hadn't been listening. "What?"

Olivia cleared her throat, "Really? Ms. Perfect Pants?"

"Olivia."

"Doris. I broke up with her. I mean, I have to say, it's my first break up where I only kissed her once and never had sex. But we broke up. That's why I went to find her. Though..." Olivia squinted, "She sorta broke up with me first too. And gave me some news. She's pregnant."

Doris was way beyond stunned, or flabbergasted, she was on the brink of being totally and utterly gob smacked.

"Doris, will you say something, anything?"

"I love you." Doris' hand flew to her mouth then pointed at Olivia. "I didn't say that, you did not hear that. Erase it from your memory."

Olivia smiled, "No take backs." She draped her arms over Doris' shoulders and felt Doris' arms around her waist. "And I don't know where I am yet in all this. Whether I love you too. Hey, I know that I like the sex..."

"It is pretty nice."

Olivia was pseudo aghast, "Nice? Nice. I'll have you know I've had Alan Spaulding begging for his Momma."

"Puleeze, he's easy."

Olivia chuckled, "Okay, you might be right."

Doris sighed, but didn't move. "And I'm stuck with Natalia Rivera and her brats for the rest of their lives."

Olivia tried to take a step back, but Doris didn't let go. "She's my best friend. No matter what happened with our... with the wedding, and the proclamations and, everything. She got me and Emma through the hardest thing I've ever faced, and she's not going to go through this pregnancy alone like she did with Rafe. I will be there for her in whatever way she wants me to be."

Doris sighed, "Guess that you'd better buy the Davidson place now huh? Give Emma back her ducks, not to mention when she runs away, it's only a short walk to Natalia's place to find her."

"What? They're not sel..."

"Remember to whom you're speaking Ms. Spencer. I'm the Mayor of this township, I know everything."

Olivia nodded with total seriousness. "Except for hat fashions." She smirked as Doris gave her a squeeze. "What? Just think of Natalia and Rafe as your penance for not coming out to your daughter sooner."

Doris groaned and after a moment met Olivia's eyes. "I don't know if I can be out to the town."

"That's okay."

"But Ashlee..."

"I actually have a bit of an idea for that."

oOOOOo

Natalia paced back and forth in her living room. Emma had gone home. She was alone again. Words ran through her head. But she wasn't having much luck putting the words together in sentences that made sense. She mumbled to herself. "Preggars, Frank no, Olivia, not anymore. Father Ray... don't go near him unless someone else brings him up. No relationships, friends, family."

The doorbell rang and she jumped. She wasn't ready. She had the sudden urge to go hide in the kitchen and wait for them to just go away. But that would solve nothing. She did idly wonder why the doorbell had rung, instead of them just letting themselves in. And by them, she meant Frank.

She found out when she opened the door. "Frank. It's not your house, so ya ring. Dude, did Buzz raise ya in a barn? Ma." Tears glistened at the edges of Natalia's eyes, "Ma, what's wrong?"

"You're such a good young man Raphael. You have to grow up some, but you're such a good man."

"Ma..."

Natalia took a step back and both Frank and Rafe entered the farmhouse. Rafe sat down on the couch while Frank looked like a caged cat and stood stiffly by the mantle, his arms crossed over his chest. Natalia sat down next to her son and folded her hands in her lap. Finally she started. "I have news."

"Ma, I don't want to hear about Ol..."

"Rafe. Be silent." Rafe blinked in surprise and went silent. "Just listen for a minute." She glanced up at Fran and back to Rafe. "And don't interrupt."

"Ma..."

"Raphael." Rafe put his hands up. "First. You need a haircut." Rafe frowned, but didn't speak. "Secondly, while she will never." Natalia paused, "For now, maybe forever, Olivia and I, we're not together anymore. Not that I really ever gave us a chance to be together, that said. We're still friends, very good friends. She's been there for me, and will still be."

Natalia lapsed into an uncomfortable silence, but to their credit, neither Frank or Rafe spoke, "And third. I'm pregnant."

Frank's mouth dropped open and Rafe laughed. Frank braved Natalia's wrath and spoke, "Are you sure?" Natalia nodded, "Is it mine?"

Natalia was about to respond when a sort of growl noise came from deep within Rafe's chest and the young man stood. Getting between his mother and Frank. "Frank, man, how can you even say those words."

Natalia stood and put a hand on her son's shoulder. "Rafe, it's okay."

Rafe bristled, "He's callin' you a whore Ma."

Frank didn't know how the conversation had gotten so off the track, "Rafe, Natalia, that's not what I meant."

Rafe made an 'as if' noise and sat back down. "Bet Olivia didn't ask that when you told her, right Ma? Are you gonna ask if she's gonna keep it next Frank?"

"Don't put words in my mouth young man."

It was Natalia's turn to get in between Frank and Rafe. "Stop it you two." She started with Frank. "Frank. yes, I have slept with no one..." She pinned her son with a look. "Any... person... since we did. Yes, they're yours. Yes, I plan to keep them, and I hope that you'll be in their lives, but I'm going to raise them, they'll be Riveras, not Coopers. This won't be the start of us again. I need time on my own, time to be me... to..." She shook her head with a sigh. "Find me. I've always lived for everyone else." She put a hand on Rafe's cheek, "And I don't regret any of my thirty four years, but I need to figure out who I really am."

She walked to the front of the farmhouse living room and looked out the window. "I've even been thinking about calling my parents."

"Whoa." The exclamation came from Rafe. "You sure Ma?"

She turned and face them again, "I don't know, but I know that the first time in a long, long time, I feel in control of my own destiny. So, I set the rules." She met Frank's eyes, "That doesn't mean I'm going to be unreasonable. I know better than anyone that a son, or two, they need their father. And these two boys are yours as well, but--I--set the rules."

Frank slowly nodded, "I... I know it's a long way away, but..."

"Olivia will be there too. I'm going to ask her to be my coach." Frank nodded again, "We can all be a family Frank." A smile appeared on her lips, "We're all family here in Springfield anyway."

Rafe laughed and popped from the sofa and went over to his Mom, giving her a crushing hug. After a moment she wiggled out of it. "Raphael. I may be done talking to Frank, but I'm not done with you young man."

Rafe swallowed and Frank spoke up, "Do you want me to stay Rafe?"

Rafe seemed to think about it for a second before he shook his head, "Nah, I figure the ritual disembowelment should be done in private. Thanks though man."

Frank approached Natalia, but paused before he got there. "I..."

Natalia pulled him into a quick hug, "I promise, I won't shed any of his blood."

This made a small smile inch onto Frank's face, "I'm going to hazard a guess that Rafe won't be back to my place tonight?"

Natalia's gaze bounced between the two men. "That is up to Rafe. Bye Frank." Frank gave a backwards wave as he left the farmhouse. Natalia turned to Rafe. "Rafe. I need you to understand that I don't know what will come next, and it may be with a woman or a man. I don't know. What I do know is that I'd like to find another priest, someone who's not Father Ray, and I'd like to have him counsel us some." She paused, "And, I would love for you to move back in, but, I can understand if doing so would... cramp your style."

Rafe gave his Mom a look, "Ma, I'm an ex-con who works at a hardware store in a town that sometimes feels like it's the size of a postage stamp, where, by the way, I'm practically related to all the eligible women in the town. I have no game to cramp."

"You'll really come back?"

"Yeah, yeah, don't make a big to-do about it Ma. Gotta teach the little brothers how to properly drive you into premature gray hair right?"

Natalia smiled and hugged her son again, "I love you Rafe."

"Love you too Ma."


	5. Chapter 5

Doris and Olivia stood just inside the doorway of the Bauer Cabin. Olivia ran a hand through her hair and spoke over the blaring music to Doris. "Were you aware that your daughter dances as if she's having one continuous seizure?"

"I was actually, she gets it from me. Emma's pretty good though." They both watched as she rocked out with her air guitar to the first of the three guitar solos in "The Boys are Back in Town".

"Well, Emma is going to be the Empress of the world one of these days and we her peons." Doris chuckled at that.

As the second guitar solo started Ashlee pulled both women into the middle of the room and Emma spoke, "Sing Mommy."

"Yeah Mom..." This from Ashlee.

The two adults didn't sing but all four of them danced. As the final guitar solo started Olivia got down on her knees and played the air guitar right next to her daughter, causing the youngest Spencer to smile from ear to ear. Both Wolfe's sopped dancing and just watched them. As the song ended Emma tackled Olivia the rest of the way to the ground and whispered in her Mom's ear.

Olivia smiled and kissed Emma on the nose and forehead. "I love you too jellybean. No more dancing and singing for now though." She got to her feet and took a hold of Emma's hand. "We have to have an important conversation. Okay? Then we'll have more fun."

Everyone found seats. Olivia and Emma on the love seat and Doris and Ashlee on the couch. Doris looked as if she was either going to puke or bolt from the cabin.

Emma frowned, "Are you okay Mommy?"

"I am Em." Olivia looked over at Doris. "Do you remember Joseph? He moved away two years ago." Emma nodded, "And you know that he had two daddies?"

Emma nodded again but before Olivia could continue Ashlee burst into the flow. "Oh My God, Emma has two daddies." She laughed, "Phillip and Rick, or, ooh, Phillip and Billy Lewis."

"Ashlee..."

Ashlee subsided at her mother's growl. "Sorry."

Olivia gave Doris a look, "That's okay. You don't have two daddies Emma. But, I'm..."

Ashlee sprang to her feet as the correct neurons fired in the correct order. "Oh My, oh, my... that, and, and... Mom? I mean, there are worse, but you and Buzz were always, but you and Olivia are too and..."

Doris covered her daughter's mouth with her hand. "Calm down Ashlee. Take a deep breath and let Emma speak please." Ashlee nodded and Doris took away her hand. They both stayed standing and watched the two Spencers.

Emma looked about ready to cry. "You... you like the Mayor, does..." She gave a sniffle, "Does... does that mean, no more Natalia, ever?"

Olivia hugged Emma to her. "Are you crazy. You have to help her name the twins that are on the way."

Ashlee's mouth dropped open and Doris shot her a look before the young woman could speak.

Emma seemed to ready to burst. Olivia's change of subject seemed to have worked, "Babies, two, really? So I can still go over there and feed the ducks and bake, and, and everything?"

Olivia nodded, "As long as you ask of course."

Emma rolled her eyes, "Of course." She looked around the inside of the cabin, "Can I see my room here?"

Olivia glanced at Doris who nodded, "Yeah, let's go get you settled, then we'll go for a little hike." Emma practically bounced out of the room at that suggestion.

That left Doris and Ashlee alone in the main room of the cabin. Ashlee spoke first, "You and Olivia?" Doris nodded, "She's nice, cool."

"Ashlee."

"Why didn't you tell me about, about you before I... I wouldn't have told anyone."

Doris nodded and nodded, "I know, I know that Ashlee. That's not why. The only reason Olivia figured it out was because she caught me at a ladies' night. I was just... I still am petrified."

Ashlee sat back down. "The Mayor thing."

Doris sat across from her. "That's part of it, yes. I know that I disappoint you, a lot. I didn't want to again."

Ashlee moved so that she was crouched in front of her mother and grasped the Mayor's hands. "So, you're a lesbian. That doesn't disappoint me Mom, I promise. I know gay people, do you like show tunes?"

Doris let fly a short chuckle, "No Ashlee dear. I don't."

Ashlee shrugged, "So, this weekend is kinda like, my two mommies boot camp?"

"No. But if we were in Springfield..."

"You may not have done it ever. Bet it was Olivia's idea. Oh, and Mom, I'm dating a forty year old."

Doris' jaw dropped, "Ashlee..." The blonde woman smiled, which didn't help her. "Ashlee Wolfe. That is not funny."

Emma popped from the back of the cabin. "What's not funny?"

Olivia followed her daughter into the main room clad in jeans, hiking boots and a windbreaker. "So, you two ready for a hike?"

Ashlee stood and nodded, "Have you hiked here before?"

"I have."

"We should totally go Mom."

Doris wasn't so sure. "I don't know."

Ashlee snagged her own jacket from the hook. "Hey, Emma, want to see the coolest tree?"

Emma looked back up at her Mom, "Then the hike?"

Olivia nodded, "Then the hike." She watched Ashlee carefully take Emma's hand and leave the cabin.

"You don't have to come, but I promise, it'll be fun." She paused, "Even city girl born and bred Natalia did it."

Doris groaned, "You're gonna use that as often as you can huh? That's playing dirty."

Olivia pulled Doris into her body and captured the Mayor's lips for a breath stealing kiss. "Playing dirty's the most fun."

Doris gave Olivia a push, but not hard enough that she escaped the hotel owner's grasp. "Fine, fine, where are the clothes, and the bug spray, and the sun lotion, I burn and peel, it's not pretty. And is the bug spray Picaridin or Deet? Never mind, it doesn't matter. Clothes?"

Olivia bit her tongue so she wouldn't laugh. "In the back room. Big room... with the big bed..."

Doris kissed Olivia, then as she grumbled to herself she started towards the back of the cabin. As she got to the hallway that led to the rooms she turned. "And, when I get Poison Ivy, you're puttin' on the calamine lotion personally."

Olivia smiled, "With pleasure Mayor Wolfe."


End file.
